Battlefield

I have been scratching my head for a couple days trying to figure out what I'm going to write about next. It's not for lack of material and subject. It's lack of motivation and decision. I am in a slump again today. I started out alright. But now, I don't know. That's my emotion. I don't know.

I'm tired of not knowing. I'm tired of a lot of things. But I'm not going to vent here. All I'm going to do is shake my head and shut my mouth.

I cleaned today, and figured out how much I really hate doing it. I hate cleaning. But it's not necessarily the cleaning aspect of it that I hate. Its having to clean alone. Being in a room by yourself sucks. Being in a room by yourself having to clean up your and other people's messes just fucking makes me want to punch a baby.

Yes I have pent up frustration right now, could you tell?
Why? No clue. I've learned to push it to the back of my mind. I'm so good at it, that now I actually forget what I'm frustrated about and just stay frustrated at what feels like nothing. Also, doesn't it suck that your frustrations are never good enough to be worth fixing to another person. It's like "what, you don't like what I'm doing? Well, that's too damn bad."  Then you try to be the better person and just accept that. But inside the frustration still grows.

And no, you don't want to talk about it. That's the last thing you want to do. You want to go outside and scream your heart out then come in and it be all better. All gone. But then again, we do live in reality.

Lame, huh?

I'm still having a pretty shitty writer's block. Maybe when my class work load calms down I'll have more to say. Maybe not. I don't understand why blogging suddenly just doesn't seem very....satisfying anymore.  It's saddening.

Smile Everyone.
I'm working on it.

Don't try to explain your mind
I know what's happening here
One minute it's love
And suddenly it's like a battlefield
One word turns into a war
Why is it the smallest things that tear us down?
My world's nothing when you don't
I'm not here without a shield
Can't go back now
Both hands, tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
Why we gotta fall for it now
I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield
A battlefield, a battlefield?
Why does love always feel like...
Can't swallow our pride
Neither of us wanna raise that flag
If we can't surrender then we both gonna lose
What we had, oh no..
Both hands tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again.
I don't wanna fall for it now
I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield?
I guess you better go and get your armor
I guess you better go and get your...
We could pretend that we are friends tonight
And in the morning we'll wake up and we'll be alright
'Cause baby, we don't have to fight
And I don't want this love to feel like
A battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield
Why does love always feel like a battlefield...
I guess you better go and get your armor
I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for
Why does love always feel like a battlefield?
I guess you better go and get your armor
I never meant to start a war
Don't even know what we're fighting for...

*sigh*